It's my Year!!

Yes you heard me correctly it's my year! and now I will fill you in on why etc... 

My friend "C" said to me this week "Its always darkest before the dawn..."  and that got me thinking the past 24 hours, with the song that line comes from playing through my head... 

The past week has been utter crap... I booked my tickets to fly back to Wellington end of February due to having enough of the earthquakes as we had 6 quakes on December 23rd all quite big in magnitude. I also know I can not start a business in a town that is having to rebuild and there is no money for anything else, so many families are struggling. 

I feel like I am loosing sight of the goals I set last year and what I am working towards.. Along with loosing the few people who truly believe in me by heading back to Wellington...


I know moving means I will not be hurt by my family again who in the end took me for what they could get from me and pulled me down and hurt me yet again.. So this move means not having to deal with it any more. Having contact when and If  I need it and not because they want to hurt me. As much as I love my family and I do love them I cant keep going through all this all the time..

I am a family person but I also know families should not be like ours, my mother is one for always going on about how she want's grand children etc and yet she cant even seem to look after my cat :( He has been missing for two weeks (just about 3 now) because he wasn't coping here with me at the moment so she was meant to be looking after him till I fly out.. sadly by the sounds of it he wont be with me :( Why would I let her look after Grandkids if she can't even look after my cat . . .  So I kind of figured on Tuesday I am just better off not trusting my mum with anything and to only deal with her when necessary in order to stop getting hurt..

Tuesday evening ended up being one filled with inspiration and happiness while working on a special piece of artwork for someone who truly inspires me for their birthday. One of the two people who for the past year have reminded me I can hit my goals! and that it's ok to land in the stars if I don't reach the moon..  I created the following piece for Charlie's 31st Birthday...

Thus brings us to today Saturday 28th January 2012...

Feeling a little sorry for myself this morning a lovely friend posted something on their facebook that instantly reminded me of what "A" has been saying to me in a different way for so long... "No one can create your reality but you!! It does not matter what others say. It only matters what you believe and tell yourself. The universe is always giving you what you ask for, good or bad." - copied from Candance's facebook

It also reminds me of a few things from the book " The Alchemist by P. Coelho" that Charlie mentioned in 2010. Which I own and have read a couple of times but it hasn't meant so much to me till this past month and making the decision to keep moving forward towards my stars...

While thinking about " It's always being darkest before the dawn . . ." this evening I realised in order to leave my past behind and be happy I have to keep moving forward and so I went for a bit of a run. I hadn't been running in awhile and it felt great! Granted it was 10pm at night,...

Had to have a giggle too as Shake it out came on my iPod while out running and I did something I refer to  as a flying Charlie ROFLMAO I know strange term... but I stood still in the park and walked briskly with my arms slightly away from my sides eyes closed and dreaming of flying!  Flying to my goals.... reaching my stars and the moon!

Leaving behind the past in Christchurch is Ok because I am earning my wings, finding my way back to me and soaring to where I need to be.... I have my Sister (Pea) and BFF (A) and a couple of close friends supporting me along with one who doesn't even realise how much he inspires me (although he will do in april! if i don't get all shy on it)...

So that's me... I am going to be accountable and focus on what is truly important... Me & my goals! I can do this and I will do this! I am learning to soar!!




This year is a big one! full of learning curves, Starting my own business, Preparing to meet someone who inspires me greatly and starting to become the person I truly am destined to be.... Bring it on!!