Day 4 and we still are awaiting news

Well it is officially Day 4 in the Christchurch Quake Disaster.

My family are safe, My little brother has now flown to Invercargill to be with his dad and out of harms way, you can tell he is traumatised & his spirit is broken :(

Mum has her work to keep her going, being a nurse shes holding it together  by being there for her patients.

Our family has taken on some damage at our home but it is still liveable considering how close we live to the CBD.

There are now 102 confirmed dead and 200+ missing, 164 Injured & 11 in Intensive care. Most of us Cantabs know people that are missing & passed away and its heart wrenching. I am still awaiting news of a few friends down there including miss 9's foster parents. Miss 9 was one of my marching girls & one i care about a lot...


I am missing my family and friends who are still down there like crazy. My bestmate thought she had lost her husband on tuesday until he turned up home and told her he walked from town after it happened. They have only been married a week!  She was beside herself texting me thank heavens I could get through and keep her going. I have never been so relieved in my life till i got the text to say he was home. Now im keeping them informed as to where they can get supplies & water because their home has no power or water and they havent even got a radio as the batteries have gone flat :(

I just wish I could do more so I spoke to my mum, She urges everyone not in CHCH to donate! & send your love and support & join in #RedandBlack day today (Friday). There is no point travelling to christchurch unless your loved ones need you or your a medic to help at the hospital or part of the USR teams.

She also thanks everyone for their love and support at this time!

Here is a heart-wrenching pic of my home town taken from the hills moments after the quake :(

so close to loss....

So by now everyone in the world knows whats been happening in my home town of Christchurch as of 1.30pm yesterday afternoon it has been in ruins and utter chaos. A violent earthquake struck and has destroyed families, homes, businesses, lives have been lost and and even the heart of the city has been ripped away from us as the iconic Christchurch cathedral fell apart :(

What is even more scary is I just about lost my younger brother. It is a miracle that for once in his life he was running late for his bus and only just escaped being killed by falling masonry from a building his original bus had fall on it, killing its passengers :(  My brother caught the one after it and has been so lucky someone was definitely watching over him. He only missed his bus my a minute or two, but hell is he grateful and so are we!


What upsets me more is the poor kid had to watch a woman whom was about our mothers age be killed instantly from falling masonry in Cathedral Square. Its not something anyone should have to deal with and for someone like my brother who doesnt talk openly about his feelings etc i cant even begin to imagine whats going on in his head. Him and I dont really get along but my god i was so relieved to hear his voice yesterday and find that even though he was in the square he was ok.  I know he is no doubt traumatised after what ive heard from my mother and from what she said he is like & it makes my heart ache that i couldnt protect him from everything yesterday. Because even though we dont see eye to eye when he was younger I protected him & i love him so much. The poor kid has had to witness things no-one should ever have to witness and things mum and i had protected him from in the past :( I feel so helpless!

Although my brother is also a hero, i was informed today by my mother that he saved a man in a wheelchair from having a building fall on him while in the street. For that I am so proud of him. In something so tragic it seems my brother may have matured instantly!

My brother and I managed to get him via text & twitter (thank you social media) to mums place who was completely freaking out, she cant stand earthquakes. Never has ever since I can remember.

Sadly my mother this evening now has to risk her life to get from one end of the city to the other with permission from Civil Defense to get to her work as shes a nurse and needs to care for her patients etc. So now I sit and wait and hope nothing happens on her trip to work. I also hope her patients are doing ok and are not too distressed and that her buildings are safe, as some of the retirement villages/rest homes are majorly damaged etc.

I  am heart broken at all the images of my amazing city in ruins, the people i love aching for missing and loved ones, and also just broken waiting to hear news on other friends whom i love so dearly.

sadly my city will never be the same again and for that i will always be upset. But i am truly grateful so many are alive and being rescued.  I am grateful for the amazing messages from my friends & family all over the world... I love you all dearly and am totally grateful to/for you... ♥


I leave you with this poem written for Christchurch....and state that no matter what I am proud to be a cantab!

Roses are red, the chalice is blue
The cathedral has fallen, many buildings have too;
You can rattle our bones, you can rip streets apart
But you will never defeat our red and black hearts.
For we are cantabrians and together we know,
...We stand tall together, through anything we regrow.

Add to your wall to remember those who have fallen and to remind us all to stand tall.
22/02/2011

Ho hum..

So Its taken me all week to blog this week, but I have been full on and even have some pretty good news.

I saw the doctor on Wednesday, and the doctors pretty happy with my health at the moment apart from my iron levels. so now they are going to do more blood tests and might have to increase my iron intake. He has also given me calcium tablets to take.

Hes pretty happy though that things are looking ok so will just have check-ups though to keep an eye on it all :)

what a day..

So today I woke up feeling a lil off, nothing unusual when I have not been sleeping properly etc.
But i felt good as I got things done this morning only to fall asleep on the couch with the cat at lunchtime.

So I guess yesterdays walk around the city and excursion into porirua wore me out more then usual.  Which is strange as its not like i was doing anything out of the ordinary but I guess the stress from other things I am having to deal with is part of the reason everything is wearing me out so easily.

I finally managed to go for a walk this evening around 8pm which was nice but due to the blisters from my new shoes I did not manage to go too far. but it was nice to head out for a lil while in fresh air.


I have been reminding myself all day that what doesnt kill me makes me stronger so hopefully it really is true & Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day on all fronts and I might get some answers I need on some other matters :)

Sitting here dreaming...

Afternoon All ☺


Didn't have so much of a restful sleep last night as woke up a couple of times with pins and needles in my right arm... (Haven't had that happen in just about 8months which is why even though everyone has said get it checked out I havent lol) If It carries on again I guess  I will have to mention it to the doc.

Anyways this morning I felt pretty exhausted so took it easy, and luckily the kitten went back to sleep on the couch beside me so I managed to relax and just watch a lil cruddy tv & catch up reading emails etc.

This afternoon, I have washed dishes started folding washing and stripping my bed before starting to feel a lil sleepy and loosing concentration (although the concentration thing is no doubt related to ADHD) lol.. so I have dinner on already so I wont need to stress about it later and can take the rest of the afternoon/evening slowly.

 I had planned on doing some craft related stuff but I think I might just wait till tomorrow to do so, so might spend the evening  reading. I've been slowly plodding along with Nalini Singh's Psy-Changeling series which I am totally hooked on!

Reading has always been something no matter how sick etc I have been is where I can escape and just enjoy things ☺

any who i may be back later to update who knows...

positive but sleepy...

Hey All ☺
Well today I had great plans to get quite a few crafty bits done and dusted but that's not what ended up happening sadly.

I woke up this morning to find my ankle, I took a tumble on yesterday (happens quite a lot as I have no fluid in my ankle joints or knee joints) was slightly swollen and very black & blue & ached like crazy.  I also slept in till just about 10am.. not sure why as I didn't stay up late last night either, so obviously my body decided I just needed some extra sleep & rest. I'm normally up by 8am at the latest.

I did a bit of reading this morning & then watched an episode of Dr Oz as he was doing an episode on Coeliac's & Gluten sensitivities. This is something I felt I really needed to watch while we are still trying to find out whats wrong with me when it comes to some foods. We have done the Blood Tests for Coeliacs but it came back clear and yet when I eat products with Gluten in them I end up throwing up or them going straight through me along with cramping and a lot of pain. It was interesting to learn a lot of people go through that and yet are told they have nothing wrong with them. So it sounds like I might have a sensitivity to Gluten, which goes well with the fact I cant have lactose either lol.

I managed a small walk (no run today) down to the dairy and claimed my free Ice Block which I was grateful for as it was quite hot this afternoon, although since getting back I have struggled to keep my eyes open since.

So it has not been very productive but Im wondering if my body is just reminding me some days I need to have a slow day and rest. I have been go go go the past week because I was feeling so good.

Tomorrow will be a better day that I am sure of. ☺

I also set myself another little goal today over the next 3 months I want to work on my Photography Portfolio and do a new one since my old one was destroyed sadly...

Anyways I am going to head off for an early night (its only 9.50pm here but im still struggling to keep my eyes open).

Spotted this pic online and it made me smile so thought I would share it here :) 

Slowly but surely...

This week was a bit of a slow start, as was a lil tired after the busy week last week. Now its Wednesday & I've managed two walks today. The down side being I did not sleep much last night, not sure why but I guess its just GS reminding me it can keep me awake at times ☺



 We've had some amazing weather the past few days here in Wellington & while I was in Alicetown. I even walked to Petone & back on the Sunday Night, which was really nice.  I had a couple of Spa's under the stars which was beautiful & very relaxing. It also helped tire me out a lot too so I slept really well while there.

 The start of the week has been a lil busy but in a good way as I have been finishing a Swap I have been taking part in via the Craftster website. Along with working on some other crafts which I will be selling ☺

Not much else to say at the moment but I will leave you with  a quote that has been stuck in my mind all day.... after the girls at Life is Bewleyful posted it the other day.

"You were born as an original. Don't die as a copy." ~ Unknown

Couple of quotes

That have been in my head all day so thought I would share them....

"There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

"We have control over 3 things in our life-The thoughts we think, the images we visualize & the actions we take. This becomes our outcome."

A Lil about me to start 2011 off...

Hi there,
So I decided for 2011 I want to write a blog post at least twice a week to remind me that even though I have bad days, I have awesome days too.  So here is a little about me to start things off...

I'm 28 and living in Wellington, and when I was 15 I first got really sick due to Glandular Fever (Mono to Americans). This lasted for about six months and annoyed me no end because of the fact I was highly involved in Marching and yet when I went to practise it tired me out. 

Now to add to that since I was born I have had an intolerance to Dairy products, & have had reflux because of it. Which I only started having to take medication for since I was 18/19.  I also got diagnosed with Asthma too.

When I was 16 my bestfriend went missing over New Years and was found two weeks later murdered. That was pretty hard to deal with but thanks to counselling & support at school etc I did pretty well and got through the last two years of school.

At 21 I had to have Breast Reduction surgery because my back was getting damaged due to them. Scariest thing to go through major surgery when your family are at the other end of the country.  I was also diagnosed with Gilberts Syndrome, and yet since I was 16 we just thought i was still having affects from Glandular Fever as i was still tired for several days after a day being really busy etc, but GS is now what they have diagnosed.

Gilberts Syndrome (GS),  A major characteristic is Jaundice, caused by elevated levels of unconjugated bilirubin in the bloodstream.  More on Gilberts here

I  had a rough year at 21 as I also had my tonsils taken out two months after the breast reduction. Though the hospital did apologise for not taking them out when I was younger as they had caused so many problems.

For a few years healthwise I did really well. In fact it was only occasionally I would nap during the day or have no energy. It wasn't till I got to 26 and had a major upset in my life that things went down hill again.


My flatmates partner at the time committed suicide in our house & I had to call for help etc. I had to help her so never thought about myself but a few weeks later I ended up collapsing and had no energy etc. Went to the Doctor who told me I needed to rest & now started diagnosing the fact I have severe stress & anxiety disorder and that she thinks I have Chronic Fatigue syndrome. But to me it just seemed like Gilberts was just reminding me It was still there as all the symptoms the doctor was saying was CFS is the same for Gilberts.  So I was put on the Invalids with WINZ and ordered to not go back to work till they said so.


The middle of 2010 I moved to Wellington, so started with a new doctor who has been great and is even trying to help me figure out why certain foods are making me sick as well. Although we are still a lil concerned as its mainly products with Gluten that are affecting me and yet the tests he did for Coeliac's came back negative so will have more tests to go.

Just before Christmas I had to have 7 teeth removed due to the effects of the reflux eating away my enamel on my teeth :( but the upside meant I am no longer having dental pain which i have suffered from since 2008.


So now its 2011, and I am about to start counselling FINALLY! for the stress & anxiety which they have said could be post-traumatic stress due to going through my friend being murdered and then having my flatmates partner do the same thing. I really hope the counselling helps thats for sure.


I still have my bad days where I barely have the energy to get out of bed and where I can just be reading a book and have no energy but I am determined to make the most of it all. Life is what we make it and I want to remember even though I have these really bad days due to Gilberts  and I seem to have food allergies they cant figure out etc yet, I can achieve anything!

I will not let Gilberts Syndrome rule my life and make things difficult, I accept that I have it but I also know I have Goals to achieve and I am determined to achieve them!

So this is my 2011 Blog to jot down inspiring quotes, Life & anything else. I hope I don't bore you with it too much :)

Marie